Wednesday, September 27, 2006
Grief fades within 6 months for many widows
Grief is not linear but cyclic, it comes to us in waves and articles such as this one can be very misleading because it looks at a single point in time rather than the process of grieving itself.
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3 comments:
How do you feel about what the article asserts?
My father passed away just over a year ago and I find that my mother passes through 'phases' of grieving, to this day. Some days it seems as though not a moment has passed since dad died.
I have found that grief lasts for a minimum of a year and that there are no maximums. We all grieve differently but just experiencing the anniversary of each holiday or birthday or anniversary, etc. without our loved one is a time of grief.
I posted the article above not because I believe what the article points out, but rather I believe there are some possible errors in the way this survey might have been collected.
In my experience as a Hospice Chaplain and as the head of bereavement for our hospice I would like to point out what my experience has been. Grief is not a linear thing. The intensity of grief does not usually decrease propoertinately with time. Just when you think "you're over it," something or someone reminds you about your loved one and the loss that you've experienced and a wave of emotions start over again. You wonder if you're losing your mind or if you will ever think about your loved one and not hurt.
So from my experience, grief comes in waves over time, so if you're interviewed while you are in calm waters after six months, chance are you're just between swells. Hang on and share your grief with others who share in your suffering and the healing will continue.
I'm Chaplain Ken and that's been my experience.
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